Life goals, Lifestyle

Finding a job you love

I know that this is kind of cliché, because honestly who has a job that they love? It seems like something that should be so simple, and yet it’s so hard to actually find a job that you love. And in todays day and age it’s required to have a job so you need to go out and pick something that you are able to support yourself on. So we end up picking a job, even if we hate it, just so we can survive. Yay, real world. It sucks.

I know the harsh truth of this all too much, having spent my entire life doing things that I didn’t not actually enjoy. I dreaded going to work, I was miserable and unhappy and hated what I was doing with every fiber of my being. I’d been doing the same thing since I was 16, and it wasn’t good. I know that jobs aren’t meant to be fun, and they aren’t meant to be enjoyed. But why not? And why is the first response to someone hating their job to tell that person they need to try harder or do better because the reason they hate their job is all their fault.

My mom would always tell me this, it was on the list of lectures that I got. Everything was what I would make it, even if I didn’t have the “best” job I could still make it better. Something happened at work? She would respond that she has always had it worse. This only added to the feeling of unhappiness to be quite honest. I was in a dead end job that I hated, and at the same time I was being made to feel like it was all my fault and I needed to make a change.

My job, Don’t get me wrong, I liked working with kids. I did not like the other aspects. So much crap went down, workers filtered out faster than a toilet flushed. For a long time I was doing so much over time I would arrive at 630 in the morning and wouldn’t leave until well after 4 or 5 in the afternoon. This was everyday for a while actually. I would get an hour lunch break (we get a paid 30 minute one so I would essential get a half hour off my work time to be able to stay longer) and it was called good. When they finally realized how long I was working they were shocked. I remember my boss saying to me “I didn’t realize how much you had been working” like it was a shock to them even though I was there all day everyday. Somedays I didn’t even get that extra break, which royally sucked.

The cherry on top was being asked the day of to stay late, or when I was “on call” unofficially they would call hours before they needed me. Each time when I was not able to I was told that I was required to do this and saying no wasn’t an option. Or I would be sighed at. There was the one time that I had missed a meeting because they way they told employees about a meeting was solely verbal. When I was cornered and asked why I had missed it I simply said (while extremely busy taking kids to the bathroom mind you, I was literally doing my job) that I honest to goodness didn’t know about it. I was accused of having an attitude and was told, kid you not, this is why people complain about me all the time because I have such a bad attitude.

Now I am a pretty emotionally aware person. I can get worked up, I get crazy, but I fully realize when I am being unreasonable and when I am not doing anything at all. That time, I didn’t do anything. I answered a question in a rather bland non emotional tone. So maybe I just have resting bitch face or something because I don’t know how I was chewed out that much and made to feel as though everyone hated me. At that point why was I even hired there?

Eventually I moved from that center though, thankfully I had moved towns I was in and was able to say that I found another center closer to where I now was living. However it was then that I realized I just didn’t enjoy childcare, and the things that came with it. I was good at my job, I did everything I was asked plus some. baby-2981946_960_720.jpgBut that’s the problem in a job like that. You have the people that try so hard and they get the brunt of it all because they actually work and then you have the people that just sit on their butts doing nothing still getting paid because they think childcare means just being in the room with the kids.

And I am not trying to complain about how crappy my work situation was, or place blame or anything like that. I’m telling the facts so that people can get an idea of what working in childcare is like. As much as I loved working with kids, there is just too much other stuff that goes on that burns you out. And while the new center was better by far it came with it’s whole slew of issues as well.

People would get hired then sit, literally sit all day doing absolutely nothing. The boss wouldn’t fire anyone and they new it. The one time the boss stepped up and told some employees that they needed to step up with their job, they stopped coming to work. We had a girl that was hired who sat. Nothing but sitting, and gossiping. Talking smack, and literally hating anyone who actually did their job. It was a fight working with her, asking her to do something made her mad. Then she would talk crap about you to everyone, also not realizing that if she was in the other room that was attached to the one I worked in YOU COULD HEAR EVERY WORD. Classy. Also classy, her talking about her entire personal life, like every extreme detail of every personal thing she did. In front of the kids. I mean I know they’re like 1-2 years old but still, not appropriate. But despite employees acting like that, and causing so much drama, they were never fired. Either because the boss was too nice or just too afraid of losing people because hiring new ones is so much harder.

I have since quit childcare altogether and moved on to yoga.29389458_10211698395800431_8398133395648937984_o Last I heard that one girl is still working, I remember on my second to last day I could hear her talking smack about me. Mocking me because I had quit so I could instead teach yoga. Like of all the things to mock someone about, you’re really going to mock me for finding a more flexible job, better hours and better pay? I simply made it known that I could hear her, didn’t say a word and just walked off. My look, I’m assuming, was something resembling “I am so done with you but you aren’t even worth a fight or a response.” And I have not a single regret that I ever quit because as much as I loved that center the people (okay one person in particular) there were enough to make me never want to return.

The process to yoga was long and difficult, the training was long. The hunt for job was even longer. And the disappointment was a bitter, harsh truth of my reality. I spent months not working, desperately trying to find anything. And while I was extremely blessed that my husband made enough to cover everything it was not without hardship.

And now, I have a great job. For about a month now I have been doing the training, going to classes and teaching! I don’t want to be that person who is jumping for joy because I have moved on in life, not really seeing the bigger picture. But you can generally tell pretty quickly what kind of job it’s going to be. My first month at both childcare jobs were pretty telling, and I soon learned what they would be like. But my first month teaching yoga was literal gold. Okay not literally, but I haven’t enjoyed working this much like ever. After I teach I have a little bounce. I’m happy, and excited to be doing it. I love to see people love what I am teaching, and I love everything about my job. While I have set classes I can also add in some subbing as well, essential working as much or as little as I want.

But to get to this point was a lot of work. I worked so hard, trained hard and got myself to where I am today. And while those lectures from my mom essential at the time didn’t make much sense I realized that yes I need to make the change. So I changed careers, and while that is probably not what my mom meant it has certainly worked for me.25075081_10210934710028764_8413503960227464115_o

So, hang in there. We can make our own futures. It might take time, but I believe that if we don’t like something in life we have the ability to change it. And if you have a really sucky job, I understand. I have been there. I am 23, turning 24 and I have just now figured out what I want to do with my life. There is no age limit as to when you need to figure this out. There is no deadline, and there is nothing saying that you can’t go after your dreams after the age of 21. And yes, sometimes we need to work crappy jobs, but that doesn’t mean that we need to be stuck in them forever. An opportunity will come along, and eventually you will be able to follow a dream and find a job that you can truly enjoy.

Book review

Cujo by Stephen King

So part of the expanding of my blog is going to be reviews as well. Since I am an avid reader (and huge gamer) I figured that I should start including some of my inputs on these things. I mean I used to do book reviews all the time on my other blog so it’s not like I am foreign to review type posts.

*Warning, the review describes cujo in mild detail about a viscous rabid dog/murder*

So recently I read Cujo, which I know it’s kind of an old book but surprisingly it’s NOT one of Stephen Kings most well known, or even well liked, books. There’s even a movie, which didn’t get terrible reviews it just wasn’t that popular either. I mean it’s not like Carrie, IT or The Shining. I won’t lie the ONLY reason that I even heard of Cujo was from a friends episode, the one where Rachel is watching the movie. I was intrigued by a killer dog plot that I looked it up and was mildly surprised to see that it was a King Novel. So yeah, enough back story. I got ahold of the book and read it pretty quickly.


So first, what is Cujo about?

In a small town in Maine Vic and Donna Trenton are trying to struggle through their marriage. Their son Tad, struggles through his own worries of nightmares and monsters. On the outskirts of town, the Cambers have their own set of issues and don’t realize that their beloved family pet, Cujo, has taken a turn for the worst after a nasty encounter with a rabid bat. As everyone is focused on their own lives, and issues, Cujo begins to terrorize the town. 

Honestly, the plot to this is so hokey. When I read the back of the book (which actually had an even hokier description) I was like “I’m not sure about this, it sounds really dumb.” but I had already looked up a better description of the plot and I knew that this type of horror was something that I would be interested in. So I read it.

And I was hooked from the first page. King is an amazing writer. Although he stated that he has no memory of this book as he was so drunk while writing it. Kudos drunk Stephen King, for he is also a fantastic writer. So the story of how this novel came to be isn’t really all that pretty, and to be quite frank the novel itself isn’t “pretty” but it’s an extremely good book.

The back story to each character is riveting. I love back story, I love to know the most out of each character and King defiantly delivers that, right down to the character who spans less than 5 pages. Everyone has a story, everyone has detail and each detail ties into the story and adds to it perfectly.

King also has descriptions down to a point, including the viscousness of the dog attacks. This is true horror in it’s finest. I think the genius of Cujo was simply how plain it was, there wasn’t some huge monster. There weren’t any boogies, no magical anything. Nothing. There was a dog, there were a kids nightmares, there was reference to a dead serial killer. It was real, and that is what made this book so truly terrifying. Horror movies hardly phase me, I know that a demon isn’t going to suddenly pop out of my closest and steal my soul. I know that the witches aren’t going to get me or that a ghost isn’t suddenly going to camp out in my place. There isn’t a shadow girl haunting me and hurting my family. But Cujo gives you chills, makes you think. Because it could happen. You can have nightmares, serial killers are real, and rabies is no myth of the mystical world. Let me tell you I was side eying my cat (who had been found in a truck as a 6 week old kitten) wondering how long rabies can stay dormant for. Word of advice, don’t look it up because you do NOT want to know. Also vaccinate your pets.

So while the rational side of me knew that this particular story wasn’t going to come to life for me, the irrational side was like “but rabies, they’re real and suddenly your cat could turn.” and for that I applaud King because I have never been terrified of a book before in my life. So besides the characters being solid, the story well written, the horror also really hit the nail on the head. I was lost in a world, wondering what was going to happen to these characters that I either loved or hated.

And the end, the plot twist. It ripped my heart out. If you have read this book then you know what I am talking about. I would recommend this book for the plot twist alone because King really knows how to tie up a novel, make things all okay and yet somehow make them not okay all at the same time.

I rated this book a 5/5 on Goodreads, it was too good for anything less. I was hooked, terrified and all in all in love with this horrible dog slasher story. I recommend this book to horror lovers, or King fans. But just remember it’s kind of an awful lots of death and horror story. So if you don’t like that then i don’t recommend. But if you like that, like I do, this is definitely the book for you. It may not be Kings most loved work, but I certainly enjoyed it.

Lifestyle, Social media

Don’t trust the people on the internet

So, how many times have we heard this in our life? If you’re a 90’s kid, like me, you have probably heard this a million times over.giphy Don’t trust people online, don’t give them details about yourself, that person in the chat is OBVIOUSLY a 65 year old male looking for a young girl. Profiles are fake, people lie etc. I grew up honestly believing the worst in people, especially those who are online. And while I may not have been online a whole ton during my childhood, I still was aware of the warnings. Only being allowed to play Neopets online; and only after my sister had done it first, giving the approval that yes I would ONLY be using it for games.

My first facebook account was hidden from my mom, which I felt so guilty about I immediately deleted and than asked her if I could make one and she relented. Talking to people online was such a foreign thing to me, like I still thought that I had to seriously protect my email because if the wrong person got a hold of it then someone could know everything about me. Chats were a huge no and you can forget about connecting with people at all besides calling them on the home phone or talking to them in person.

I was also of the generation that grew up with the introduction of cell phones into all of our daily lives. I can remember picking up the oldest, crappiest flip phone from a free box at a garage sale and all my friends thought I was literally the because I had a (unserviced) cell phone. I was 12, this was the life that I grew up in. 10670275_10202881873312879_6495196671531450835_n

But slowly, we all got phones and we all got facebook. My Facebook dates back to 2008 so I was one of the firsts. Not super early I know, but I can remember when facebook became a thing. After being released to everyone, it was thrilling to be signing up for something that could instantly connect me to all my friends, plus some people that I knew but had never actually talked to. I wasn’t quite old enough at the time to have had a myspace, nor was it really that popular like facebook has become.

cool-momBut the warnings still stayed, even when society began changing. My mom constantly asked me who I was talking to. Who I was chatting. “Who are you texting” she would ask. much to my annoyance because I was not about to tell her about the cute guy I liked that week. I wasn’t about to tell her about my friends conversations, I was not about to tell her any of the conversations I had. Not because they were particularly bad, but because I grew up in the generation that NEEDED to protect who they talked to and about what because then we would get the “lecture” and we grew up hearing it so we didn’t want it anymore. I was constantly questioned about who I was talking to; their age, gender, what their family was like, siblings, parents, did they go to church? How do I know them? I remember my mom getting so mad one time because upon this intense questioning about one of my close friends I mumbled a very annoyed “I don’t know” or a blasé one word answer. She had told me “when I was younger I knew everything about my friends, I knew all about their family, I knew what they liked and I even knew how long their parents had been together.” saying this in a very matter of factly, and judgmental, sort of way. It wasn’t that I didn’t know, but I was sick of being peppered with a million questions because somehow if I knew the wrong person I would end up dead. giphy-2If I talked to the “wrong” person, was associated in anyway or was friends with them, that could mean life or death. And while I can understand the fear of this in any parents eyes now, as a child it seemed a little too much to have to tell my mom every friends whole life story.

So, when I got to college, things really changed. I had a taste of freedom that I had not had before, especially with the internet. Not drastically mind you, but that warning began to fade from my mind. My first room mate was assigned to me and I got to know her through her facebook. Although facebook did a poor job, mainly because you make facebook what you want it to be. That was my first lesson in the reality of online.

I began to grow my twitter, chatting with people over twitter threads about how awesome Buffy the Vampire Slayer was. I’ve had twitter almost as long as facebook, thanks to a certain high school blocking facebook and not twitter; all the kids at my school signed up for one. This was my first taste of the friendliness of strangers on the internet. The warnings all but faded in my mind at this point. I mean my mom never really spent that much time warning us so much as banning us from really chatting with random strangers online. And while she had interrogated the crap out of us, or at least tried, about who we were in contact she didn’t have to continually tell us to be wary of the internet. The times she did say it, combined with the need to know every thing we did, was enough to put the warning in our head.

So, when I decided that college wasn’t for me, and I left the big ol city of Chicago to travel back to dreary old Iowa I had (in all reality) nothing to do. I had snagged a part time on call job at the time and had whole mornings free. I was not used to this, I had no class, no tests, no social life anymore. I really suck at making friends and all the ones I had made I had left back in Chicago. So I made use of my library, using the online catalogue. I remember that this was about the time that John Greens “The Fault in Our Stars” came out. I read it, I loved it and I wanted more. Somehow, I had stumbled upon the depths of youtube “book tube” community. I found a fan music video for TFIOS and instantly fell in love. When I realized that there was this whole community making videos solely dedicated to books I was thrilled.booktubes1 I wanted to be a part of this, I wanted to join in. So, I sat down and filmed a review on my phone of enders game. The video (and my channel) has long since been deleted. I filmed it wrong, the quality sucked but I was hooked. I began to follow book people on twitter, talk to them about their channels. Have discussions over different books. And my life changed.

This certainly wasn’t the first time I had chatted with people online. I constantly frequented Omegle, and many friends I had made from camp were strictly online. Although Omegle was a little more risqué. You had to be pretty careful when on Omegle. But Omegle was good for a chat when you were bored, or for a nice troll once in a while.


I began to “meet” people online, we shared the same interests and we got along really well. I had never been wonderful at making friends so to be quite honest it was mostly me talking to people on their stuff they posted and them responding. But a few people actually stuck around. And some people I even talk to today. I remember I met one of my friends in the book tube community. We both made videos and both enjoyed it but did not have the major passion for it that others did. We don’t always talk every day or even every week but we still communicate and that friendship means a lot to me. Pushing past those warnings and boundaries, proving that not every single person online is a pedophile.

I met another friend over Game of Thrones, and we chat on occasion as well. While we haven’t exchanged personal information I do consider us to be good friends. We share a lot of the same views, and a huge love for game of thrones.

And just recently, I joined twitch. I have had the best conversations with people over video games. I have no fear telling people about myself now. Heck I run a blog where I try to be as open as possible. You can truly meet some really amazing people online, and while the warnings we received as children held some truth we also live in a very different world now. We live and thrive in an online world. People make money from youtube. People Stream them playing a game, and as weird as it sounds, you meet some really solid people on there. twitch_logo_animation

And to be quite honest, the people online have never really hurt me quite like the people in my real life right now. All of my best friends are “online” or texting friends. Mainly because I made my best friends in Chicago and then moved. I also really suck at keeping friends apparently, and have somehow made the ones who live close to me mad. So I love my online friends. I love my gaming buds, my bookish peeps, my tv show pals, I love my dearest best friends who I have to text because they live 6 hours away.

And while I still interact with real life people, in the real world, the online ones just connect with me more. They mean so much, and maybe it’s because we share interests or maybe because I communicate better online or maybe I just come off as less annoying online. Who knows, but what I do know is that these friends stick by me while the ones in my life don’t really do that. And I could be holding up a huge standard for people in my life to meet, but when it becomes apparent that the people online will make an effort to talk to you, to read your stuff or watch your streams but the people in your actual life can’t text you back or hang out or support you in any way as a friend it’s not hard to realize why I like my online friends so much.

I’m also not saying that all people online are golden either, I have definitely met the worst of some online. People who get mad when you say a simple statement, who abuse you for having a certain view. It happens a lot in the book community actually. Someone likes a book and the whole community shuns them because that book is “bad” or there was the time that I pointed out that no matter how terrible a book is said to be it’s morally wrong to purposely go to Goodreads and give them a bad review without even trying to read the book. And same goes for reviewing it very well if you haven’t read it. Online, it can be a mess sometimes. Theres sucky people everywhere. But at least online you can control what you see a little bit more.


But really what it boils down to is finding people with similar interests who you can get along with. Wether thats online, or in real life. And take the internet warning with a grain of salt. Be safe, sure but don’t think that every single person online is a terrible person just out to get you.


Lifestyle, Uncategorized

Blog Changes

I really want to keep up a blog, it’s something that I have been wanting to do for a while and yet never have seem to settle on one blog. Honestly I’ve gone through several. Book blogs, Christian blogs, lifestyle blogs. Each topic I am passionate about. But I can never seem to keep up a blog solely on a single topic. I thought this time around I would be able to track my journey of trying to eat more plants. I thought with the added bonus of yoga, zero waste, essential oils and other similar topics it would be a breeze. But honestly, there is just not that much to talk about. Once I played out my entire life and journey and what I am trying to accomplish I was at a road block. I promised posts and they just didn’t happen.

Now I don’t blog to gain followers, or likes or anything. I blog because I love to write and I love to talk about things. Mainly a blog is a good way to connect with others with similar interests and things like that. As much as I would like to keep this a singular blog, I honestly just can’t.

Now I’m not saying that I am going to delete my whole blog and leave people hanging. I’m just saying that I want to expand. I want more in my blog. I want to be able to talk about what I want without feeling as though I need to fit into some standard that I had initially set up for myself. I don’t want to be tied down but a singular topic that I had decided I needed to blog about. So I am expanding. Instead of being a solely vegan blog, or solely yoga, zero waste etc I want to just expand to a basic lifestyle blog.

So in this blog, I will be talking about-well- my life. I read a lot, I do photography, I love cats, I try my best to make it to church every sunday and read my bible. I game- a lot- all types of game. I love board games, I love books, heck I even love to review a good book. I’m married, I rent an apartment. I’m from Iowa, best known for cows and corn. And I love meeting new people and chatting about similar things. So that’s what I want this blog to reflect. My loves, my life, events and just all in general lifestyle things.

I will fully understand if this change seems sudden, or too much. I’m not going to take it personally if I get a few unfollows for this. Like I said I’m not doing this to gain followers or anything. It’s just nice to write things out. So if the new variety is not what you signed up for when you followed this blog that’s okay. People change, blogs change, social medias change. When I first started twitter it was because facebook was blocked at my high school. Then when I got to college I was huge into Buffy and followed 50+ million accounts dedicated to Buffy. Then it was books, and reviews, then plant eating things, zero waste and now games. I’ve come to realize that tying to limit myself to just one thing I like is impossible.

So, I’m going to update my blog. The name, maybe layout, header photo and web address (if I can). But it will still be me, still the same quirky (or really bad) blog posts. It’s just going to expand, be a little more broad and talk about real things in my life. I will not delete old posts. I will just add on. Book reviews, real life chats and struggles, favorite games, my experiences streaming and game happenings, photography, things that hit home with my christian life, encouragement and general items like that. Also obsessive cat posts because cats are the bomb.

So just giving everyone a heads up, that I will be transitioning to a lifestyle blog and not just a veganish blog. If you guys stay on board for this process I will seriously love you. If it’s not your cup of tea, I will still seriously love you.

If there is anything you guys want to hear about as well, just hit me up and let me know. I am by no means an expert on anything but I do have a lot of things that happen in my life and know a thing or two about general life stuff. Thank you for all your patience as I try and figure out who I am in blog form.

Lifestyle, Social media

Facebook groups ruined my life

Okay, so facebook groups didn’t actually ruin anything. I’m still living, fully alive and very much enjoying my life. But I recently went through, and left, all but one of the facebook groups that I am a part of. I had joined some vegan pages, as well as a professional photographers one as well. These were closed groups that I was required to answer a question and get approved to join, so it’s not like a page I just followed and got annoyed with. These were closed and private groups of supposedly like minded individuals that I thought I would be able to get tips from, to help me progress on through my lifestyle. How wrong was I.

Now, I don’t know if anyone else had really had any bad experiences with groups, but I know that I certainly had. You think that I would have learned the first few times I had joined various groups, but nope. The first time I ever joined a group I was just starting out in switching over to eating more plants. I thought a vegan group would be perfect for me. I also still thought honey was a vegan food, so there’s that. But I was really excited, I thought being a part of a group would be so motivating. After I had joined though, I noticed just how vicious people online can be. I mean I had known people are like that online, I have experienced it first hand. I just wasn’t expecting a group of people focused on living a more peaceful life would be the most vicious online. The first things I noticed were people commenting nasty things. Someone was wanting to be vegan and had questions, making it clear that they had not fully transitioned yet. See in my mind that’s totally fine. I myself am not fully transitioned. We may not buy meat or dairy but we are still in a transitioning phase. But these comments that people directed at them were so rude. Calling people stupid, commenting links about how bad it is if you’re not vegan alongside rude comments as to how dumb they are for not knowing these things. I left that group very quickly. I could not believe that people who wanted to encourage others in this lifestyle would be so mean to people they don’t even personally know.

So when I found the zero waste vegans group, I thought it would be a better choice. And for a while it was. I got great tips, there were also people who were not 100% vegan. Everything was actually really nice. I had no regrets for joining this group. But then, the comments trickled in. Slowly, at first. But they grew in numbers. People commenting on how you SHOULD word a post. Claiming offense in things that weren’t even offensive. There always seemed to be that person who would start a fight over a post that had nothing wrong with it. ALWAYS! I had posted a question at one point on the page, and the comments that I got back were quite rude. Telling me how I should be doing things in my life, telling me how wrong I was, telling me in regards to my question that I was basically crazy. I had asked a simple question in regards to my life, and instead of answering the question or giving an honest valid opinion on the matter people thought they needed to educate me on myself, my life and how I did things. That was my last straw. No matter how I explained my reasonings, people were basically telling me I was being stupid over something that I was doing, that was really not any concern for them.

At the same time, I had joined a professional photographers page. As a photographer I thought this would be good, get some advice and tips from others. As soon as I joined I realized my mistake. People were commenting snotty things, mainly on the posts about people inquiring about prices. Telling people that their prices should be higher than what even the photographer themselves could afford. Saying photographers with prices lower than that were no good, less quality etc. As someone who is really striving in the photography community to provide quality services at a fair price this really got under my skin. One commenter was telling everyone how they would charge 125$ for one print. A SINGLE PRINT! And kept telling people that you need to have prices that high no matter what area you are located at because someone will be able to afford it.

Maybe that works for their business, but in the area that I live in no one would ever pay that much for a single print. And in the day and age of digital people are more interested in having digital copies of their photos. It’s not a bad thing to offer digital, but apparently you are ruining your business if you do so. So far, we are doing fine with starting up a new business while offering digital copies. And maybe that could be true in other locations but where I am located that’s just not the case, and honestly making money is not the first thought I have. I love photography, I love what I do and I also want to provide services and products that people also equally love. Products and services that are affordable and high quality. But if you said that in the photographers group people would probably die of shock.

So, a few days ago I went through and I deleted myself out of those groups. I didn’t like how I was feeling when I saw their posts. I didn’t feel like I was getting any help from them either. I felt really down when I pulled up the group page and when I saw the conversations going on. I don’t want social media to bog me down, and I don’t need it to make me feel worse throughout my day. Social media, to me, is a place to document my life and share it with those who I don’t get to see everyday. To connect. And to see how other people are doing as well. And the wonderful thing about social media is that a large part of what you see is controlled by the user. So I took control.

And this post isn’t to say facebook groups are bad. Some groups can be really awesome. They made a group for our teacher training group and I love that group. It’s a place to connect to all my training pals. But if the group you joined is making you feel anything less than happiness, you don’t need to be apart of it. And with the power to join and leave any groups we want I did myself that favor and just let things go.

It’s not about me, or them. It’s about what I need in my life right now. I don’t need negativity, and I am not afraid to do something about it. It’s nothing personal to those groups, but I can’t get on board with leaving mean comments on other peoples statuses. I can’t get on board bullying people. I can’t get on board with taking a holier than though attitude because you have certain skills. We all have our own opinions and thoughts, that’s what makes us so unique. We should be able to share those without being attacked, or people being rude about it. It wasn’t like people were commenting any opinions or questions that were rude or cause offense. People actually tried really hard to share things that affected no one. Yet people were still ruthless. I’m not really about all that in life and in social media.

So, I think I will just follow one more cat page or yoga page on facebook instead. Because that’s what makes me happy. And sometimes, clearing out negative things bogging us down in life is just what we need.

Life goals, Yoga

It happened for a reason

A while ago I had posted a blog post about disappointment, after having not got the yoga job that I had my eyes on I was a little more than disappointed. You can read more about it here. Even though I had told myself that it was happening for a reason, I had still had my heart set on that one particular job. At the time I thought that was where I needed to be, the job that I needed to do. It was my end all be all. The road to recovery was a long process, but I managed to get through a rather dark time in my life. And as of late, I am beginning to see why having my heart set on one thing is not always the best way to look at things. You see, recently I did manage to find a yoga job. Months later, after my first initial searches and after my bitter period of rejection, I found something that is going to be even better. This is a story, a journey, of realization of one human who thought one job was the end all be all of life.

Months after the audition and my inevitable heart break, my sister and messaged me telling me that our local YMCA was looking for substitute yoga teachers. I was a little hesitant at first, and upon my recent searching had not found any job postings for yoga positions at the Y. I had already sent out several emails, with no response, and applied to the yoga jobs that I could find- again with no response. I had mentioned in my post about disappointment that I was interested in teaching yoga for athletes. I contacted my old alma mater but to no avail. No response, not even an acknowledgement that anyone had even received my emails. At this point I was not going to take anything personal, if they were not interested in the offer than that was on them and not a testament about me. So when my sister told me that she got the Mind and Body Coordinators card from the YMCA I emailed that same week. Immediately I got a response, and a link to the newly posted job. I filled out the job posting application as fast as anyone possibly can with an online app. With the job application filled out, a meeting set up later in the week I was feeling really good about everything. But I held that thought in the back of my mind, refusing to let myself be too hopeful incase of impending disappointment.

After the meeting, a date was set for me to demo teach a class for them. After discussing the options of how I could demo my teaching skills a full class was settled on, after admitting that I can still get a little nervous it was mutually decided that maybe I should just try for a full on class. So that is what I did.

I was nervous as all get out, I spent the whole night before I had to go an audition with my heart pounding so fast it felt like I had just run a sprint. I couldn’t sleep. I had to keep reminding myself all the way up until the audition to breathe. Just breathe, breathe, breathe. I forgot to do my demo, I was too nervous to do any assists, and I felt like I had modeled some poses way too much.

But none of that mattered to the YMCA. They want teachers to be themselves, to bring their own things to class and make each class they teach their own. I was so new this type of thinking. Having taking my training at a power yoga studio, everything was set in stone. There is a technique that you have to follow, and you can not stray from it. I was used to being told exactly what to do. So when it was made clear that I have this whole new freedom, I began to blossom.

I was offered a class to teach, as I stood in shock being told this I was trying to wrap my mind around anyone wanting me to actually lead a class. I went in expecting to be a sub, which in my mind was a wonderful place to start. I could gain the experience that I needed. They told me that they could not believe that was my first class I ever taught. To be fair, I couldn’t really believe it either. I had actually made it through the whole class, I was not all shaky and I felt as if it flowed very smoothly. I got a lot of thanks after I was done teaching. Practicing in your training is so different from leading an entire class, and I was honestly nervous to mess up in front of so many people. I did pretty well though. And the class I taught was well received. That is the difference in the YMCA staff. They gave me feedback as soon as I was done, they encouraged me and told me how much they enjoyed what I taught. They didn’t act like they were better than me, they thanked me and they told me exactly what they thought and how excited they were for me to be teaching.

Long story short, I have this amazing job at the Y now, and I feel like this is really the best place for me. It’s non-profit, which in my opinion is the best. I want my focus to be on helping people, on bringing yoga to people. I feel as though at the YMCA, I will have every opportunity to do just that. I am so blessed to be able to have this opportunity, and so excited to be starting on a brand new journey with yoga. I am doing training now but will be transitioning into teaching as soon as I finish my training.

Maybe in the spring I will go back and re-try to audition at the same studio. I will have more experience at least. But right now, I am going to be able to enjoy this opportunity of just being there for people and for the community. I don’t have to worry about teaching “well” enough anymore, or wonder what it was that I had done wrong. Maybe I just wasn’t right for that place, maybe I didn’t fit the strict standards of teaching, or maybe I was just destined to be here at the YMCA, where I can really learn to care for and help others. Either way, I can be happy and fully content with where I am at.


Homemade Oat-milk

Literally one of the easiest recipes any one will ever make, which is why it is my favorite. There is no extra prep, hardly any work and this recipe is so easy (and cheap) to do. I got this recipe from my vegan cookbook-find it here. I highly recommend this cook book there are a lot of really simple, tasty and easy to make recipes in here. Anyways onto the recipe.

You will need:

Raw oats (1 cup)

Water (2 cups)

Vanilla or agave syrup (optional)

Cinnamon and/or nutmeg (optional)


To make:

Blend water and oats together in a blender (we use a Nutri-bullet and it works just fine) until blended. Strain out through a strainer. For smoother milk strain again through cheese/milk cloth. Add in vanilla and spices to taste. Chill and enjoy.

This milk is so tasty, so easy and so cheap. Oats are probably one of the cheapest items that you are able to buy in bulk, which really makes this milk one of the best recipes. Plus the oats just have a really great taste as well, which makes for a super tasty milk. Great for any recipe calling for milk, cereals, to drink and more.